Tuesday, October 18, 2011


Sadly this weeks Record Player comes with a dark cloud hovering above it's head. After last weeks shenanigans I feel it's time to bring down the heavy hand of authority. I have to do this to protect those who come along to enjoy the music every week.

The Record Player prides its self in bringing a relaxed atmosphere, a place to take time out from the day, a place to listen.

So it began last week. Abbey Road played and a scuffle broke out during Maxwell's Silver Hammer. All well and good, not everyone likes this piece of McCartney whimsy - Lennon called it 'Paul's granny music' after all.

Further investigation revealed the scuffle wasn't over the merits of the song. It was members of the audience attempting to suppress a triangle player. He'd brought the triangle along to 'enhance the vibe'. I gave the audience a stiff talking to.

Afterwards, some came along to aplogise. They admitted to bringing along the following - a stylophone to Dark Side of the Moon, a comb and paper to The Stone Roses, marimbas to Ziggy Stardust and harp to Bon Iver.

I feel guilty for not noticing. I'd thought these new sounds were coming out from the uncompressed beauty of vinyl. Turns out it was some kids fannying on with instruments they'd brought along.

I never thought I would have to say this, it saddens me that I should have to. From here on in - NO MORE INSTRUMENTS.

Anyone who looks as though they're carrying will be searched, and if found in possession of instruments will be taken to the Record Player parallel universe version where Phil Collins 'No Jacket Required' is in perpetual rotation. You have been warned.

Queen II by The Queen Group this week.

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